bye bye

im leaving...

wont post anything here..

Thanks anyways...

im back....i t hink....

shox.... i didnt blog for the longest time!!! im not that busy nor lazy.... im i think i dont really have time to blog.... because of these addicting games at facebook!!!! CEL kasi eh!!! hehehehe....
oh well... im back... im gonna post some of my notes or something something from my laptop later....

for now.... i really one this to burst out.. this friggn personal trainer... shox... hassle!!!! i mean she keeps on pushing me to renew my training with her... but i stll have 15 session left!!!! grrrr!!!! then one time she called me up because her friend is willing to pay my training in advance so i will just per her friend instead!!! what the fuck!!! so i said!! NO!! so there... then now... she said that if i can pass by the gym so i can sign an advance receipt even though we wont workout today... so that she can reach her quota.... grrrr... KAPAL!!!!!! i mean she is nice and all but super THICK nya mehn!! then one time her new client who is scheduled after me went to the gym early... guess what she did... she said... "may utang ako stretching sayo ha!!" grrr... so that time i decided not to renew my contract with her.. ill just play along and be nice coz i have 15 more session then after that..BYE BYE!!!! gonna transfer to RCBC instead..less hassle....

still awake...again...

i think this week is the longest week ive ever had... well last Friday, i was still alive and kickin after being awake for 36 hours and then going straight to Tagaytay for a team "bonding" then now i really really cant sleep.. again.... well alst time because of my car breaking its key into two pieces... then now... no special reason... i just cant sleep... maybe because of thinking to much about things..... my what if... my past... presnet and future... my life... waaahhhhh plus havent been to the gym for 1 week!!! waaaahhh i miss gym!!! grrr... oh welll have to eat my wendys burger... i love wendys... minimum of 150... yeahbahh!!!....

if you love someone, ask for nothing..

..got this from Mariel... super ok sha..... its like the things and feeling inside me that was set into words... luv it!!!

if you love someone, ask him for nothing. dont hold him from his destiny. dont keep him from going off in search of his own answers. dont ask him for commitment. you will know commitment is real when it is something given willingly, and not as something obligatory. dont ask him for promises. if you are patient, if you have faith, you will know in your heart when the right time for promises has come.

and when that time arrives, then you will see that you have both lost nothing by setting each other free, and have instead gained a richer, fuller life, a wealth of experiences, and a stronger certainty of your desires.

but should he not return to you, then life hasnt cheated you because no promises were broken. your bitterness will not last long, and you will feel thankful and blessed that at the very least, this beautiful soul has colored your life, that knowing him has already made life infinitely more meaningful.

by setting a person a free, you run a risk of him not returning. but always remember that you found him beautiful precisely because he was free. people are like sunlight. you can feel their warmth, and their glow, but you cant hold them in your hand and keep them with you forever. people choose to stay. but a choice is made more meaningful when it is made despite so many other options..

MESMERIZED

Im so mesmerized when I saw you again…
the way you look
the way you stare
the way you move
the way you glare…
Im so mesmerized on all
the things you do and the words that you say…
your voice
your smile
your look
the way you act…
I like the way you are…
I definitely like you that’s what I want to say… though I know there's so may things that may not work… lines that may cross..… and im not the same as you… though I still really like you that much…

My October fest 08'

Base from my Starbux planner... this is the month where I should have been to Singapore already.. sad to say that didn't push through.. oh well...
1. Bob's Birthday Bash was fun! videoke, FOOD!!! BEER!!! ofcourse lasing again so sleepover at Aina's house... tulog all day!!!

2. Interview hits with my soon to be Personal Assistant with Joe... shox... may isa over qualified!!! UP grad!!! WTF!!!!!

3. Days weekend of BobC- super saya.. namiss ko yung days and the purpose of being there which is to serve.... hay... sarap magbigay ng F night.. ewan ko super ok yung F night ko with this girl..galing!!!

4. Las' Birthday Party- TR bonding time with poker, booze and FOOD!!!

5. Despedida of Kuya Roy- it was fun... i miss my friends sa old work ko.. oh well..

6. For the first time na drain ako being with someone... as in super nawalan ako ng energy.. kasi ive been holding my self not to curse at him or treat him like SHIT! kasi he was kind naman pero the BRAGGING!!!! mehn!!! grabe!!! pati his funny joke as in HAHAHAA di sha nakakatawa... mean na ba ako.. pero hindi e.. if makikilala mo sha..mehn super grabe...arggghhh...

7. Started going to the GYM..heheheh nakakaaddik pala sha talaga... had fun the other session with Jam and IVO..grabe dancers pa talaga na kasama ko..wahahha then saw Antonio "CUZ" wahaha miss ko sha!!!

8. Preparation for the Anniv Mass at Bianx Pad.... it was fun!!! sarap ng pizza wrap ba yun... luv it!!! si Karen may pa baon pa sa akin na Kenny... wahahah..pero above all else naging professional wire twister kami!!! wahahahha.. and also the stem wrapping but it was easy for me and bob kasi we have this process eh... wahhaha...

hay.... di ko na maalala yung iba..hehehe.. basta i had fun this month....Now, I'm looking forward for the Anniv Mass and Lianne's Birthday bash hehehe its this week na....grab bilis ng panahon!!!!!

Not Interested

i really have to burst this out... shox pangit naman ng come back ko sa blog ko.oh well... irritating kasi e... let me give them code names B1 and B2. B1 is someone that I dated before but eventually friends na lang kasi dont have a thing for B1 eh..walang chemistry...so there.. then one time he started making kwento about this girl which is ok naman sa start kasi we are friends.. pero yung halatang paulit ulit.. irritating naman kasi... we are not that close and di ko kilala yung girl... i really want to ask na... "DO you have other friends pa ba na you can share that story with?" hay... stress!!!..kasi naman the kwentos ewan ko ba if minsan stirr or just to make inggit or ewan ko ba.... then lets move on to B2...
B2... nakilala ko lang somewhere... pero not interested at all... so palawak na lang ng connections... then biglang same as B2 bragging na nagbbring sha ng food sa gusto nya.. ok sabi nya sweet sha.. pero bakit kailangn ko malaman? ummm kasi sweet sha for others pero sa akin not that much.... i can pay for my food... or if may PA na ako papabili ako... hay... am not jelly or anything.. pero those kind of information na we are not that close... um please tell those stories na lang to your friends... coz im really not interested and again we are not that CLOSE.. dont know you that well...hay....

Sinnerman

ok.... done this but with a different questions.... some are super "PASOK SA BANGA!" but some are also weird..wahahhaa... love doing this kind of stuff.. its like a fortune cookie for me...hehehhe

RULES:


1. Put your music player on shuffle.

2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.

3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!

1. IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
Crash Into ME bye Dave Mathews Band

2. WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL? 

Strong Enough bye Sheryl Crow

3. HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?

All in your Hands by Duval of Smoking Popes

4. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?

Tomorrow by The Rocking Horse Winner


5. WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?

Fall on Me by Moonstar88

6. WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?

Only One Too by Jewel

7. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
Danger Zone by Gwen Stefani


8. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?

Mariposa by Sugarfree

9. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BESTIE?

Scooterboy by Mojofly-Kitchie days


10. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?

Who Knew by Pink


11. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?

Smooth by Matchbox20 with Santana

12. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?

Get up Stand up by Bob Marley

13. WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?

In Her Bedroom by Big Blue Monkey

14. WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?

Alright by Kinnie Starr

15. WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?

Scotty Doesn't know by Lustra

16. WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?

Right in Time by Lucinda Williams

17. WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?

Follow you Down by Gin Blossoms

18. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?

Since U Been GOne by Kelly Clarkson

19. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?

A New Tattoo by Urbandub

20. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?

Torpe by Barbie Almalbis


21. WHAT WILL BE THE SUBJECT WHEN YOU REPOST?

Sinnerman- Nina Simone

Rachael Yamagata - Elephants

discovered this at Arriane's multiply site
this is so poetically delivered....
i love it!



If the elephants have past lives, yet are destined to always remember,
it’s no wonder how they scream,
like you and I, they must have some temper.
And I am dreaming of them on the plains, dirtying up their beds,
watching for some kind of rain to cool their hot heads.
And how dare that you send me that card when I’m doing all that I can do.
You are forcing me to remember when all I want is to just forget you.
If the tiger shall protect her young, then tell me how did you slip by.
All my instincts have failed me for once — I must have somehow slept the whole night.

And I am dreaming of them with their kill, tearing it all apart,
blood dripping from their lips, and teeth sinking in too hard.
And how dare that you say you will call, when you know I need some peace of mind..
If you had to take sides with the animals, won’t you do it with one who is kind?

If the hawks in the trees need the dead, if you’re living you don’t stand a chance.
You can lie there and say you are fed, but there are only two ends to this dance.
You can flee with your wounds just in time, or lie there as he feeds,
watching yourself ripped to shreds and laughing as you bleed.

So for those of you falling in love, keep it kind, keep it good, keep it right.
Throw yourself in the midst of danger, but keep one eye open at night.

do i need this?

I'm looking for a part-time personal assistant.

Requirements:

-NBI clearance/police clearance/brgy.clearance

-knows how to speak in English is a plus

-Birth Certificate

Job Description

-good personality

- able to keep appointment and scheduling diary.

-mature, reliable and well organized

-presentable

-will be able to wake me up if needed

-will be assisting during shopping days free breakfast/lunch/dinner during these days

usually 2 times a month

-be able to organize my things when needed

-can drive is a plus

salary 1000-2000

hahaha.. i got this idea from my dream... hehheeh oh well already posted this to one free posting site...

wOrDy WoRdS -Sept 08'

Giving up is such an ugly word
if you didn’t fight for it
Or not given a chance to fight over it

How can I forget when I want to live with it

The memories that made me change
The person that I have become

I can still feel you
I can still remember every details
Every second that I was with you

I can still smell you
Running into my nose trills
Passing through my brain
Igniting the memories that we had

Your not that perfect
But I only see the perfectness through you
Perfect for me to be with
Perfect that I can only be with a person
who is you

lingering the smoke
as it decays my life

sometimes, you can't have what you want when you want it,
but that doesn't mean you can never have it.
Everything takes place at the right time. Its not a NO, its just NOT NOW

a broken magic
can open a naked heart

September Fever

September 2008 is the best September I've ever had… coz.. Mostly for the past Septembers, I keep telling myself … "wake me up, when September ends.." line.
The list of my wonderful September:

1. Back to my Golf jive…loving it!
2. Birthday Celebration of Mia at her house.. Of course cam whoring is PRESENT!
3. After the celebration we just decided to go to Tagaytay.. Spontaneity alert…wooot woot!
4. Start of my two weeks training of EDI and AI…. Though got sick for the first to third session of AI..waaahh..boo!
5. Joe San Antonio's Birthday bash at Warehouse… a very crazy night!!
6. Nina's Birthday Celebration at Taal/Tagaytay…started to be addicted to WAKEBOARDING!!
7. Other Birthday Celebrants:
a. Fayah's Birthday
b. Regal's Birthday..ahem…treat!!..ahem
c. Pretch's Birthday…hmmm… maybe soon I can visit you there my friend
d. Jen's Birthday aka Jeniperst!!
8. been having lunch with Shanna and Satch with my GXS friends…. Always a fun fun day!

A really really amazing September!!! How I wish it would never end….

starting to quit

its been 5 days of moi not smoking... well... its because ive been terribly ill but actually it feels great... i think im gonna TRY to stop this nasty habit for good.. =)

Leaving the Tempestuous Kingdom

I didnt decide to leave this early
but they keep on pushing me
pushing me to the edge of not caring
edge of ending

I hate people who assumes
especially when they dont know me at all
where is your ground of thinking or even judgement
still i cannot do anything about it
thats who you are..who they are...

I know i dont have yet a stonger back fall
but what the fuck!!im not that strong...
strong enough to keep myself from being sane
when all of them are just one big twats

as coffee girl told me...
which is better: peace of mind or material things..
nut in this case...
Peace of mind is really much better...
over having thins Kingdom keep me with insanity...

oh well... im just so sad
that it happens this fast ..
im not sad because they choose someone over me
im sad because they judged me with nothing...

I want you-Im afraid I wont know where to stop

this is the song or the video that triggers me back to that dark alley again,, shit fuck!!! i hate it!! though for a fact i love this song... loving the hate!!! grrr!!
ok... this song really is talking about my past!!



I want you

Oh my baby baby I love you more than I can tell
I dont think I can live without you
And I know that I never will
Oh my baby baby I want you so it scares me to death
I cant say anymore than I love you
Everything else is a waste of breath
I want you
Youve had your fun you dont get well no more
I want you
Your fingernails go dragging down the wall
Be careful darling you might fall
I want you
I woke up and one of us was crying
I want you
You said young man I do believe youre dying
I want you
If you need a second opinion as you seem to do these days
You can look in my eyes and you can count the ways
I want you
Did you mean to tell me but seem to forget
I want you
Since when were you so generous and inarticulate
I want you
Its the stupid details that my heart is breaking for
Its the way your shoulders shake and what theyre shaking for
Its knowing that he knows you now after only guessing
I want you
Its the thought of him undressing you or you undressing
I want you
He tossed some tatty compliment your way
I want you
And you were fool enough to love it when he said
I want you
I want you
The truth cant hurt you its just like the dark
It scares you witless
But in time you see things clear and stark
I want you
Go on and hurt me then well let it drop
I want you
Im afraid I wont know where to stop
I want you
Im not ashamed to say I cried for you
I want you
I want to know the things you did that we do too
I want you
I want to hear he pleases you more than I do
I want you
I might as well be useless for all it means to you
I want you
Did you call his name out as he held you down
I want you
Oh no my darling not with that clown
I want you
Youve had your fun you dont get well no more
I want you
No-one who wants you could want you more
I want you
Every night when I go off to bed and when I wake up
I want you
I want you
Im going to say it once again til I instill it
I know Im going to feel this way until you kill it
I want you
I want you

stupid#1

restrictions..
dont know what to do
is that what i feel
i dont actually know what i feel
still
lingering through my bones
flowing through my feeling
the PAST

hunting me...
like darkens in an abysmal hole
non stop dropping..
flowing..

when shall it stop
a better gum that wont waste
till it evaporates

been stupid lately
going back
going tback to that street
peaking...
reminscing..
dreadfully crying..

denial.. acceptance.. forgiving...
not forgetting...
better off or better pising off
both?

no..
im just drunk...
but true enough..
i was there...
i know..
i am still waiting..

stopped crossing

Cross-Posting
Disable cross-posting between Multiply and Blogger

stopping from cross-posting...
I hate stalkers!!! grrr!!!

McQness

so, na tag ako ni sega... pero i think na tag na din ako ni lee about this.. pero now lang ako nagka "umph" gumawa..hehehhe

1. Each blogger starts with 10 random facts/habits about themselves.
2. Bloggers who are tagged need to blog about their own 10 random facts/habits.
3. At the end of your blog, tag 10 people and list their names.
4. Don't forget to leave them a comment and tell them that they've been taggged and to read your blog.

McQness

1. when i eat nuts like Nagaraya... I only eat the coated part... then throw the nuts... or give it to someone..hehehe

2. i love collecting jackets.. =)

3. when travelling.. i always sleep... by car, plane or even banka..hehehe

4. when eating.. i dont usually talk.. and i dont like other people touching or putting unwanted things on my plate or without my permission...hehehe

5. i always wash/alchohol/sanitize my hands after touching money...

6. i love indie, crazy, morbid, gruesom films...

7. when i get very angry.. i cry... but after that.... your dead!

8. i hate when people makes you "mukhang tanga" and people who stabs you at the back!! i forgive but defenitely i dont forget!

9. when i scratch my nose or eyes!! grabe may sound!!! this i have to remove na talaga sa system ko..hehehe

10. when im drunk all of my birthmarks turns RED! hihihihi

other than the poeple i tagged... whoever read this.. your automtically tagged!! wahahah

Free stuff is really LOVE!!!!!

I was talking with my mother.."bonding moments" with her and opened a topic about Lea Salonga in Rodgers and Hammerstein's CINDERELLA..
OMG!!! she has tickets already!!!!! woot woot!!!
I LOVE IT!!! with a plus plus for having the Orchestra Seat!!!! waaaahhh!!! am so excited!!!!

Independence Day=Singleness

Independence day is about our country getting freedom and all.. but now i am also celebrating my own freedom... I am 1 year single already! Thank GOD!
Before, I was so bitter that it didnt work.. but now I thank God that I was out of that moment!!! My friends were right, it is not worth it... people like them just makes you stronger... oh well.. Cheers to LIFE!..=)